************I sat in my cozy black leather chair in the used-to-be school room and dissected the evening. I was wishing to have done things a little differently, wishing to have had more patience, and silently praying for wisdom as a mom. It was just one of those times when being “mom” wasn’t fun.
Keilani slipped into the room and stared at me. We smiled at each other. She busted out with a “Hi!” She, just like a seven-year-old, had already tucked the day’s events away deep within her mind, not forgotten, but filed away. She took a few steps into the room and hugged me. Over my shoulder she eyed a tall blue children’s book nestled within some papers on a bookshelf I mainly reserve for reference books. On its cover is a little girl hugging her daddy while they ponder up at the moon. Keilani slipped off my lap, grabbed the book, and sat at my feet.
“This is my book?”
“Yep.”
I explained that it is my favorite children’s book so I keep it near me to pull out on special occasions. I crinkled my nose and squinted at her, “Will you read it to me?”
She giggled at the thought of reading me a children’s book, but quickly agreed, “Suuuuure…”
As she sweetly read the words, I swallowed back the lump that developed in my throat. I was instantly taken back to the memories of preparing to tell my testimony at my local church a few years ago. Everybody has a story of God’s mercies, and my story is one of how God took a child from devastating circumstances and pulled her (me) out of a pit of self destruction and onto a path of helping others who have been through similar situations. Truly we serve a God who uses for good what Satan meant for evil.
You see, I opened and closed my testimony with words from this book. This book may be a book written for a child, but no matter our age, we will never outgrow words that communicate reassurance and unconditional love. Never.
So I picked up Keilani and scooped her long and lanky body onto my lap to hug her close. I reminded her that I will always love her. She squeezed me back, not truly understanding the significance of a moment that was just forever etched into my memory.
These are some of the words from the book, Just in Case You Ever Wonder, by Max Lucado.
Long, long ago God made a decision, a very important decision… one that I’m really glad He made. He made the decision to make you. The same hands that made the stars made you. The same hands that made the canyons made you. The same hands that made the trees and the moon and the sun made you. That’s why you are so special. God made you.
…If you looked all over the world, in every city in every house- there would be no one else like you… no one with your eyes, no one with your mouth, no one with your laugh. You are very, very special.
… but as you grow and change, some things will stay the same. I’ll always love you. I’ll always hug you. I’ll always be on your side. And I want you to know that… just in case you ever wonder.
Remember I’m here for you. On dark nights when you hear noises in your closet, call me. When you see monsters in the shadows, call me. On hard days when kids are mean and don’t treat you like they should, come to me. If your grades are bad and your teacher is mad, come to me… ‘cause I love you. And I always will, just in case you ever wonder.
Most of all, I’ll be here to teach you about God. He loves you. He protects you. He and His angels are always watching over you. And God wants me to make sure you know about heaven. It’s a wonderful place. There are no tears there. No monsters. No mean people. You never have to say “good-bye,” or “good night,” or “I’m hungry.” You never get cold or sick or afraid.
In heaven you are so close to God that He will hug you, just like I hug you. It’s going to be wonderful. I will be there, too. I promise. We will be there together, forever. Remember that… just in case you ever wonder.
